Monday, June 28, 2010

Summer, summer, summer time....

No dog shows, no agility trials - just hot, humid, lazy days.  Thought I'd take this opportunity to ramble about things I find amusing now that before dogs, I wouldn't have even considered thinking or saying.

Post dog show, go to any "family" restaurant near the show site and you can hear the most outrageous things.  "Did you see the rear on that bitch?" is my personal fave :)  And as you all know, dog people have absolutely no compunctions about discussing the most intimate bodily parts and functions of their dogs.  I actually like to watch the faces of the non-dog people at nearby tables.  Try it sometime.

At the National this year I came around a corner in the hotel and walked into a group where one woman was exclaiming that she knew "all I need to know about frozen semen."  Not at all an unusual thing to hear in a group of dog people but, imagine being a non-dog person?

Several years ago I hired a handy-woman to replace the back door on my house in New England.  Said woman was a lesbian (I throw this in now so you will see how funny the story is later).  What should have been a couple hour job ended up taking 8 hours and during that time I had to keep the dogs busy and out of the handy woman's hair.  So I gave Sam and Gin each a bully stick.  Sam decided to enjoy his outside and trotted out the door that was being replaced.  The very responsible handy woman felt the need to tell me my dog was chewing on a stick and, was that ok?   I replied that yes, it was ok and that it was a bully stick.  Oh, what's a bully stick?  Ummmm, ahhhhh, well, it's a treat made from a  bull or steer penis.  Really?  Yes.  And he likes that?  Yes, Sammy loves dick......  Yes, that's what I said.  I used those exact words.  I don't know what I was thinking.  I told the lesbian handy woman that my male dog loves dick.  BTW, did I mention she had brought along an assistant for the day?  A male handy man who was gay.  I thought he was going to choke when he overheard the conversation.  For a great description of how bully sticks are processed go here.

Owning and showing dogs has taught me so many things.  Mostly it's taught me that things that used to make me blush don't anymore.

3 comments:

  1. omg that is so funny...

    lol

    totally made my day

    ReplyDelete
  2. Very funny post!

    My dogs love Bully sticks but they no longer get them. Wilson broke a molar on one (and so did his Lab buddy). That was about a $700 Bully stick!

    ReplyDelete